Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Leaping Liz--er, camels!

Happy Leap Day! And, since it coincides with Hump Day, how about accessorizing with this:


I love leap years. Once every four years, my birth month is a whole day longer. If you're prone to celebrating your whole birth month instead of just your birthday or birth week, this is a very good thing. Especially since everyone knows birth-month calories don't count. Score!

And what's not to love about an extra day? A freebie. A spare. A gift.

Not that many of us get the day off. Harumph. What's up with that, anyway? Seems like it would be the perfect holiday. If everyone would agree to pretend it's just like any other year--going from Feb. 28 to Mar. 1--then we could enjoy an un-numbered day without obligations.

Wouldn't that be a sweet deal?

Now I'm going to be a little...


...nosy. What are you going to do with your freebie day? 

Or, if you have to work, what would you like to be doing?

(Me? Why, I'm going to take advantage of my last day of free calories, of course. Pass the chocolate!)

BONUS QUESTION: We've all heard "look before you leap." Do you tend to be a looker or a leaper?

Monday, February 27, 2012

Tag! I'm It!


I've been tagged by Patsy Collins, which means I have to answer the 11 random questions she's asked, then tag 11 other people with my own 11 random questions. (Only I can never decide who to tag, so I may have to handle that part another way. Let me think about it...)

I like random, so here goes:

1. Do you have a favourite word or phrase?

Yes.

Oh, you want to know what it is? "Defenestration." It means to throw someone or something out of a window.

2. What do you like on your pizza?

Mushrooms and black olives.

3. Where do you get you books from?

The library, Barnes & Noble, and Amazon (for my Kindle).

4. Favourite drink?

A two-cherry Manhattan. Or a dirty martini. Hmm. Maybe I should just go with a dirty man-tini. ;)

5. Who would you most like to meet?

J.K. Rowling.

6. And why?

So I can absorb her genius by osmosis. Plus, she looks like she'd be fun to share a drink with.

7. Favourite colour?

 Teal.

8. Where have you never visited but would like to go?

Scotland.

9. Do you like hats?

I love hats!

10. What weather do you like best?

A crisp, sunny day, with October-blue skies, puffy white clouds, and a hint of woodsmoke in the air.

11. Were these questions random enough?

Yes, I believe they were.

Okay, here's how I'm going to do it: Anyone who wants to play along, consider yourself tagged by me. You can either do your own blog post about it, or you can answer here in the comments.

Your Questions:

1. Did you learn anything about me from my answers that you didn't already know?

2. What's the last thing you put in your mouth?

3. Which of your feet is bigger, your right or your left?

4.  What's your favorite regret?

5. Panty preference (either for you or your partner): briefs, hipsters, bikinis, hi-cut, or thong?

6. Favorite beer: lager, stout, ale, or root?

7. What do you secretly like doing that other people might think is silly?

8. What's your favorite vegetable? (Um, to eat.)

9. If you had to give up alcohol or chocolate, which would it be? (I know! Scary, huh?)

10. What's the most embarrassing TV show you will admit to watching?

11. What's the most dangerous thing you've ever done?

Have fun with it! :)

P.S. I found out In a Fix is now listed on Amazon and B&N! Not available until September 4, but still . . . Holy crap, it's real!

Friday, February 24, 2012

Feline Friday

Happy Friday, Blogging buddies!


Wanna know what this is? Well, pop on over to The Debutante Ball and I'll tell you! :)

 HINT: It doesn't have much, if anything, to do with safety. Or shoes. And only peripherally with cats.

Speaking of cats, here's a pic of my part-time cat:



She technically belongs to the neighbor who lives catty-corner from us (I know! appropriate, yes?), but she visits almost every day. Frankly, I think she likes us better. I'm sure it has nothing to do with the gourmet kitty treats I slip her whenever I see her. Sadly, she doesn't like looking straight at the camera. Not that I can blame her -- that flash is annoying.

Actually, she's the ideal pet -- all of the cuddles and none of the crap. Purr-fect. (Go ahead. Groan. I can take it.)

Random question for the day: Are you a cat person or a dog person? (Or both? Or niether?)

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

A Really Bad Hump Day Poem, from Me to You

So, last night on Twitter, I asked if you'd rather see a cute camel picture here today, OR a cute camel picture AND a really bad poem.

(Yeah, I know. I blame the alcohol.)

Anyway, it was unanimous among those who participated in my Manhattan-induced poll. Allow me to apologize in advance.

Seriously, I'm so sorry. (Not for the picture. It's adorable. For the poem. It's dreck.) 




If . . .


If I gave you a flower, would you be my friend?
Would you write a sweet email, and then click on "send"?

Would you laugh at my jokes and pretend that you care?
If I forgot to wear pants, would you try not to stare?

If I asked you to swim, would you jump in my pond?
If I wound up in jail, would YOU post my bond?

If I cooked you a meal, would you act like it's good?
Even if it doesn't taste quite like it should?

If I gave you a flower, would that be enough?
Or do I have to come up with money and stuff?

THE END*


*Possibly of my whole writing career. . . 

Monday, February 20, 2012

A Day Off? B!TCHING!! (Or is that "A day off b!tching"?)

Happy Presidents' Day!


In honor of the day, I've written, for your enjoyment and edification, a 10-page essay on the greatest contributions of the executive branch to our fair country.

Not.

Tee-hee. Like I'd do that to y'all. Seriously, what kind of b!tch do you think I am?

(Don't answer that.)

Oh, heck. Go ahead and answer that. I just hope the answer is "funny b!tch" or "badass b!tch," or something along those lines. I'm happy with almost anything except "boring b!tch."

Are you taking a day off today? I think you should. Yes, even you guys who don't live in the States. It would be a great show of solidarity. Plus, DAY OFF. Duh. What could be wrong with that?

To recap today's questions:

1. What kind of b!tch am I?

2. Day off or not? 

Oh, I just thought of a bonus question!

BONUS QUESTION: What kind of b!tch do you want to be?

Friday, February 17, 2012

The Friday Hyposthesis

Me. You. The Ball. Now.

Wow. Was that too terse? Sorry, I'm . . . uh, testing a hypothesis. Um, yeah. That's the ticket. It isn't at all that I haven't got a Friday post in me this week.

What's that you say? What kind of hypothesis?

*clears throat* Well, um, I can't tell you that yet. Because it would, er, skew the data.

You wouldn't want me to skew the data, would you? WOULD YOU??

Of course not.

I'll let you know the results when they become apparent to me. In the meantime, come see me at The Debutante Ball. 

What's that you say again? (My, you're inquisitive today.) You want a clue before you click over?

Okay, here: A virgin, a time traveler, and a circus walk into a post . . . 

Now for your question: Are you a virgin time traveler who ran away to join a circus?

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Happy Humpletine's Day!

And here's my cameltine to you:

There. Isn't that romantic? 

(I sincerely hope you all had better Valentines than that yesterday.)

I had a very nice Valentine's Day. Candy, cards, flowers, booze, a gourmet dinner prepared for me . . . all provided by my sweetie, the deity. Thanks, sweet cheeks! You're awesome.

But I have to admit I have mixed feelings about Valentine's Day. I mean, it's basically a totally commercialized holiday designed to guilt people into buying unnecessary fluff-stuff for people who might cry if they don't.

(You could, of course, take a moral stand, and not succumb to the external commercial pressure. Your sweetie might understand. And I hear make-up sex can be hot. Still, it's a risk I wouldn't take.)

And what if you don't, at present, have a sweetie? Gaaah. Then you feel even worse on Valentine's Day.

On the other hand . . . chocolate.

Okay, chocolate wins. (Chocolate always wins.)

Bonus: All that Valentine's Day candy is half price today. Sweetie or not, half-price chocolate rocks!

But wherever you come down on the VD conundrum . . .

Will you be my cameltine? 

Monday, February 13, 2012

Zombies (Almost) Ate My Blog Post

Yeah, sorry about that. Last night, instead of writing up a post for this morning, I watched The Walking Dead with TG.

Come on, how am I supposed to resist a good zombie show? Especially one where the hero is named Grimes? I mean, how often does that happen?

See, "Grimes" is always the goofy sidekick. Or sometimes the incompetent bad guy. But the hot hero? Never. Until now!

I give you Rick Grimes:



Gotta support that. I owe it to the family name.

BTW, it really is a good show. (Once you get past the gross zombies falling apart, that is. But you can shut your eyes for that part. I do.) It's highly character driven--there are some great, complex characters--and has conflict out the wazoo.

Funny thing is, I don't even like zombies. But I do like this show.

So, is there a show (or a movie or a book) that managed to grab you in spite of the subject matter not really being your cup of tea?

Friday, February 10, 2012

Earnestly Dissing Ernest

Yo. Me and Papa Hemingway are hanging at The Debutante Ball today. Come say hi. Check your adverbs at the door.

Okay, so Ernie isn't really there with me. Which is just as well, because I'm kind of dissing him. Well, retroactively dissing him.

But I make up for at the end. Sort of.

Okay, not really. But I soften it.

*sighs* Honestly, I think it all would have worked out better if only he hadn't had such a phobia about adverbs. They really aren't the devil. When applied judiciously, they can even be quite helpful.

What's your take on adverbs in fiction writing?

A. Love 'em!

B. Hate 'em!

C. What's an adverb?

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Hey, you celebrate your way and I'll celebrate mine!

So, I'm going to see if I can keep this birthday thing going all week...


Actually, while this nice camel is celebrating in my stead, I am hard at work on my WIP. Because, goofy writer that I am, that's what I think is fun. 

What's your idea of fun? Besides looking at crazy camel pics, that is?

Monday, February 6, 2012

I'm not really here today, because . . .


Yes, it really is, and the above is a fairly accurate representation of me today.

I only hope my cake is as good as Emma's:


A Magnum, P.I. cake with chocolate sprinkle chest hair? Oh baby!

Also,



Because a hairy cake and a dirty martini would make my day.

What's your favorite way to celebrate your big day?

Friday, February 3, 2012

Who's up for some more Verifictionary fun?

Before I send you over to The Ball (where this week our topic is "Fan Fare"), how about a few new words for the Verifictionary?

bratshot -- what you load the rifle with when you're chasing kids off your lawn.

cubcesse -- a boil on a baby lion.

detop -- opposite of debottom.

evesion -- hiding stuff on the internet.

foodybus -- how foodies get to the big foody festival.

goinfran -- when Fran leaves, this is what she becomes.

nourth -- a little-known direction right between north and south.

ovent -- the air duct in between the nvent and the pvent.

stpro -- the patron saint of hookers and NFL players.

tedenest -- the most teden of them all. Whatever the heck "teden" means . . .

terderti -- what you are after mud wrestling in a cow pasture.

toxesses -- poison girls. 

ulinti -- what u are if ur sweater has too much static cling.

undog -- the cool name for a cat.

Can you think of any other definitions for those? 

Or have you run across some good "words" from those verification boxes when you're commenting on blogs? 

P.S. Don't forget to stop by The Ball and say hi! I love to see you there, too!

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Hump Day Art (No, it's not what you think. Or maybe it is...)

Because, seriously, what could better on a Wednesday than camel sculptures?


1.




2.



3.



4.



5.


6.

Which is your favorite?

Bonus points if you can come up with captions for any of them. 

Need an example? Okay, for #4: "You're gonna love my nuts!"

Have fun! :)