The All-Important Controller of the Red Dot

I don't have a real post* for you today, camel, horse, or otherwise. But I have a really good excuse.

I have been overwhelmed with my responsibilities as Controller of the Red Dot.

What the hell (you may be asking yourself, if you tend toward profanity; otherwise, possibly just "What") is "Controller of the Red Dot"?

Well, you see, TG and I are currently cat-sitting for Vera and Valentine, who belong to our daughter and son-in-law, while said kiddos move. (Farther away from us ... *bites knuckles and stifles sob*) Moving=Upheaval. Cats and upheaval don't tend to mix well. We all thought it would be better for everyone if the kitties didn't get upset by all that packing. Or, you know, get tossed into a cardboard box by the low-bid movers contracted by the Navy.

Soooo, V & V are here with us until the kids find renters for their current house and then find a suitable new abode down Florida way.

It hasn't take our furry friends long to take over our household. Their very favorite thing, next to mealtime, is the laser pointer. So I've been doing a lot of this:



No, that's not Vera or Val, and for God's sake, those are not my legs. I've been too busy wielding the red dot to take any video, so that was for illustration purposes only. You know, in case you're the one person on the planet who hasn't played laser tag with a pet.

This is a pic of V & V:

They are being deceptively sweet here. They will terrorize the household if I don't spend an adequate amount of time controlling the dot that gives them so much running/stalking/hunting/bouncing-off-the-walls (literally) pleasure.

*hears crash from other room* Um, excuse me. Gotta go...

*Huh. Looks like I do after all.

What's keeping you busy these days? 

In Which Linda Reveals a Deep, Dark Secret

You were expecting a camel, weren't you? HA! Surprise! No camel today.

Why?

Because. That's why.

(What? I'm not allowed to be contrary?)

Today I feel like posting pictures of a horses instead:

Photo courtesy of Wikimedia Commons.

Aren't they adorable? They're Icelandic horses, a hardy and good-natured breed. I think they look somewhat Teddy-bearish.

Here's a closeup:

Photo courtesy of Wikimedia Commons.

You want to know a secret?

I actually like horses better than camels. (There. I said it.)

Seriously, the whole Hump Day camel thing started as a joke. I was looking for something to blog about. It was a Wednesday--"Hump Day"--so I thought, hey, I'll post a picture of a camel. 

Then it just sort of ... stuck.

You want to know another secret? I'm kind of tired of it. (Horrors!)

Now, I'm not saying I'll never post another camel pic. I probably will. But I thought it was high time I came clean about my true quadruped preferences.


How about you? Any deep, dark secrets you'd care to reveal? Come on! It's liberating.

Bonus Question: If you're a writer, do you give your characters secrets? 

If so, are the secrets only from the other characters, or are they from the reader, too? Do you ever suspect your characters are keeping secrets from you?

BONUS-BONUS Question: What's the most surprising thing a character has ever revealed to you while you were writing? 

Trying Desperately to Think of a Post Title without Using "Hump." Not Succeeding.

Busy, busy, busy! You know how it is. Just trying my best to get *cough* ahead ...

Photo courtesy of Wikimedia Commons.

... of things.

What? It's a freaking bust of a camel. I had to use it here! The bad pun is a bonus. 

(Hey, it could be worse. There was this one pic of a Bactrian camel wearing a bra on its humps, but I'm sparing you that. Nobody wants to see that kind of bust.)

So, anyway, I finally did it. I succumbed. Yes, I made a Facebook author page. (Click here if you want to see it.) 

Why did I do it? Well, the obvious answer is promo. It's a dirty word--I mean, selling yourself is so...well, so mercenary.* But also a sad fact of life in the writing biz. It would be nice if all a writer had to do was, you know, write, but it doesn't work that way. In order to keep on writing, you have to gather new readers. If new readers can't find you, they can't read you. So you have to establish some sort of presence. 

I already had a personal Facebook page (like half the world, apparently), and that worked for me for a while. Mostly it's a way for me to stay in touch with long-distance family members and friends, and to play WordScraper with some of my buddies. Why should people who are mainly interested in my books be subjected to my mundane, day-to-day status updates? Difficult as it is to understand, some readers out there might not be interested in what TG cooked me for dinner or how giggly I feel after my second Manhattan, or even my oh-my-God-this-weather-sucks diatribes. I mean, hell, if they really want that stuff, they can always come here. Or Twitter.** 

Also, there are some things I want to share with family and friends that I don't want to broadcast to the universe.*** (I know! Who'd have thunk it?) Having a separate author page will help me keep a division between my personal life and my job. There's already so much overlap between the two that some form of separation seemed like maybe a good idea. 

Aside from the trolling for "likes," which kind of goes against my nature but apparently is a necessary evil, I think the idea might work out. 

So, what's your stance on author pages? 

Do you have any favorites you can point me to? Any un-favorites? What do you like (or hate) to see on an author page? 

(Yeah, I'm looking for ideas. I'm hoping to eventually make the page engaging and, you know, not annoying.)

Thanks in advance for any helpful tips! Or for just stopping by and saying hi. I like that, too. 

*And, honestly, I'd always imagined if I wound up selling myself for a living that it would involve better lingerie. 

**Notice how I cleverly snuck that link to my Twitter account in there. Yes, I am nothing if not conflicted about this in-your-face promo stuff. 

***Don't worry. I'll still pepper this blog with inappropriate observations about life in general. ;)

SHARE THE LOVE Contest Winners!

Thank you to everyone who played.  You all get a great bit high five from me!

I have randomized you all (hey, that sounds kind of kinky, doesn't it?) and have let Fate decide the outcome.

And now, without further ado, the WINNERS of the signed copies of In a Fix, the lovely Lindt chocolate bars, and the future copy of the Quick Fix ARC are.... *drum roll*


Tynga
Judy, Judy, Judy
Silverlight
Adriana Cloud
Deniz Bevan




If you guys will email me your addresses at linda(dot)grimes(at)gmail(dot)com, I will get your books and chocolate in the mail to you. The ARCs will be sent when they're available.

Share the LOVE! And, you know, the CHOCOLATE.

(Wow. A Friday post from me. Haven't seen that in a while, have you?)

Photo courtesy of morguefile.com.

But today is special. Valentine's Day is right around the corner.

Honestly? I'm kind of ambivalent about Valentine's Day. It's one of those high-pressure holidays, front-loaded with expectations. If you're half of a couple, you stress about not disappointing your other half. And if you're not, you stress about the world revolving (at least for the day) around everyone who is.

(Or you don't give a crap. That works, too.)

But be that as it may, I still want to do something. For y'all. Because I'm FEELING THE LOVE and I WANT TO SHARE!!! (And really, any holiday that involves ingesting chocolate can't be all bad, right?)

I'll bet you're feeling the same way, huh? That impulse to share? Well, I want to help you do just that. 

So, I asked a composite of all my friends (represented by the image below) what she would like for Valentine's Day:

Photo courtesy of morguefile.com, text courtesy of moi.

Can't make out the small print? She's saying: "What I'd really like is a sexy romp and some chocloate!"

(Guess the balloon and wine weren't enough for her.)

I says to myself, "Self, you can provide that!"

Then, not wanting to be misunderstood about the sexy romp part, I quickly added, "In book form!"

Here's the deal: If you have a friend you'd like to share the love with by sending her (or him!) a Valentine, just leave me a comment saying "I want to share the love!"

I will then choose five winners at random, and will send, to the person of their choice* a signed copy of IN A FIX along with one of the following delicious chocolate bars:

*If the person of your choice happens to be you, that's okay by me. There's nothing wrong with sharing a little love with yourself. ;)

BONUS: The winners will receive an ARC of QUICK FIX, to keep or share, as soon as I have them in my hot little hands. (When will that be? Your guess is as good as mine. But I figure it has to be earlier than Aug. 20, when it will be released in stores.)

Contest will close Monday, Feb.11, at 12 noon EST. Please spread the word!

 Even if you don't want to enter (though, honestly, free chocolate for a friend? surely your friend is worth that), you can always leave a comment explaining your philosophical views on the value of boycotting such a commercial holiday.

HAPPY FRIDAY!

Humpy Birthday to Me!

Wait...that doesn't sound right. Well, you can blame Aurelia Blue -- she's the one who said it to me first.

Anyway, yup, it's my birthday today. Anybody want to help me blow out the candles?

(Oddly, I couldn't find any that said "Humpy" instead of "Happy.")

Or, really, maybe this should top my cake:

Not exactly sure what the day has in store for me yet. If TG had his way, it would include this fellow:

Have to admit, that is one handsome bulldog (as bulldogs go), but I still wouldn't want to follow it around with a plastic bag, if you get my drift. Hmm. Maybe he'll take me out to dinner instead. (TG, I mean. Not the bulldog.)

Already celebrated my birthday over the weekend, Grimes-Clan style. My SIL threw a birthday bash for my two birthday buddies (my nephews) and me, and it was full of fabulosity. We have to group birthdays, because my extended family around here is big. I like this, because I'm of the opinion that most things are more fun when shared.

Now, if any of you out there are wondering what in the heck you can do for Linda on her birthday (because I just know it's your priority today *grin*), you could always pop over to Amazon's IN A FIX page and click the "Like" button. I have it on good *cough* author-ity that this action really helps authors.* At the very least, it's fast, easy, and doesn't cost anything, so I don't feel too bad soliciting.**

*I'm not sure how it helps, precisely. In fact, I'm not sure how any of Amazon's mysterious algorithms work. But apparently they do something that helps sell books, so I guess I'll play. 

**Of course, if you don't like IN A FIX, don't click on it. Please don't feel like you have to tell me you don't like it. Not today, anyway. I mean, it is my birthday. Just quietly don't click on it, and we're still good. :)

May your Hump Day be spent appropriately! :)